by Bahman Abdulrahman
Well, I will try to avoid any confusion. Unlike, my writing “instructor”, I will try to differentiate between simple and simplicity. I adore him because he is philosophizing (this term in AUI-S means misleading and Stupidizing students) some times. He is the author of comments like “readers don’t care” and “do not study hard”.
He is a good destructive criticizer. He welcomed us first day in class by saying “I will send many of you back to EWPLI” I (Bahman) don’t want you understand as he was inelegantly saying “I don’t care if you understand” Let’s set Mr. Composition, the producer of so many Chomsky, Baxtyar Ali and well know former Malaysian Foreign Minister Kishore Mahbubani, aside for a while. Since we are blessed with studying Geometry (many say math), I would like to prove a point by using Axiom I (Euclid Book 1, P18)
Proposition XXXXII. Theorem
In a university (any university) where tutors are luxuriantly paid and teaching various subjects “carelessly”. May they all be equal?
Let’s say, R, S, and G are the given tutors. (Cont)
The American University of Iraq-Sulaimani is the given university. (Cont)
We must prove that each of R, S, and G are respectively equal. (Thesis)
Therefore, we must consider two different possibilities.
I. They may not be qual.
II. They are equal. ( R, S, and G)
First, if they are not equal. Each of the(R, S, and G) would have some wider knowledge of their topics. And they (each) would have a “Goal” and a “Method” to approach their goals. If we say they are not equal, we make a regrettable mistake. Therefore, not just they are equal; they live on three different planets where Facebook.com is not very famous.
Hence, because no straight lines can be produced from any of this three given points, they are equal. And according to Axiom I which stats “Things which are equal to the same things are equal to one another” and because,
· Each of them is teaching, at AUI-S.
· Each wakes up at 6
· They noticeably miss their “female companions”
· Students don’t know what they are talking about
Therefore, R=S=G (regardless of, age, nationality, and area of expertise) and this theorem can be expanded and applied to other instructors if you wish to. Q. E. D.
My day around AUI-S may hardly pass with a useful sentence. Ordinary days start at 8, first 50 minutes of the day is “mercifully” dedicated to Geometry. We spend minutes to solve problems like the one above. After, tough 50 minutes of Axiomizing and postualizing, we grab our bags to find a place to take a breath. Where shall we go, there is no space, students are everywhere and they shout some out of “Blessing Stupidness” some out of the fear of a “certain failure” (my English composition instructor).
People passing by insulting in Kurdish, Arabic, Persian and few adorable English “F words” I wanted to ask, why they are so rude, there must be a problem. It turns out there are “Problems” which no one could address them and tell their origins. Problems like studying math, religion and computer science all together carelessly and purposelessly. Don’t bather brother I have heard the bluetoothed answers”This is a liberal Arts university; this is how we do “Business”. But my encouraging English Composition instructor polished this answer with his artistic touch and added “If you don’t like it the door is open” I ponder, will my AUI-S fellows leave the university like the Drama Group did at the Student Party few days ago?
Second class I attend after Math is English Composition. Oh man this is awful. By now you must have an idea of my instructor. I’m not sure; whither he will send me back to EWPLI after this post or get crimson and start attacking me. I go to class doing nothing, perhaps because I don’t know anything. We spent hours on explaining what the thesis statement is, yet when it comes to writing we fail to write one. My Composition class is sort of a relaxation room, where people are quite and sometimes you hear some unintelligible words from a shadow sitting on a brown chair and hiding behind a desk. Whenever, the instructor asks us to say a word, he always end up with silence from all and clear internal anger. I guess, we are quite sanctified as we don’t have so much homework. We have a lot of time so we spent most of it repeating what we were doing in EWPLI. He sometimes gives us a piece of paper (Printed from the Internet, I started to doubt what will happen if there was not the internet!!!) to read and he will go back to read his favored novels forgetting about the class and wasting our time and investors’ money.
Let’s move on, the third section is really great. It is Western Civilization or the well known W.C. class. We do far better in this class. We don’t much like the book; we follow the instructor’s preferences. Now we all love Greeks, soon we will have some Hebrew and Greek experts. We criticize whoever his name is mentioned. Most students have enough time to sleep and relax in class. Many are complaining that this class is not intelligible and they may fail. We usually ask a question and dig the Arab desert for an answer, as soon as the class is over the desert expedition team will come back and the sleeping students wake up.
Finally, since no one speaks up, we like this stupidizing chaos. Why is this happening. According to my W.C. instructor we must be skeptical even radical skeptical. None of the answers given by radical Skeptical tutors could persuade me because I’m “Skeptical”, too. Skeptically I would like to ask few questions. Do these fellows really know what they are doing? Do they have a slandered at all? What is their goal (s), making money or making money and teaching us? Remembers I can’t be persuaded easily. I would like really hearing your answers. Or I can wait until you (plural you) leave the university and publish an article answering our question and criticizing your bosses.